Brake 5 Gals!!! Once again, I have asked my friend, Ida Mundell, to share with us. She shares below on parenting as a TEAM SPORT. I encourage you to take her tips and put them into good use. Feel free to comment with your own tips of what works in your home, too! Enjoy, share, and Keep Smilin’, Jenn
Ida Mundell lives with her husband and 3 children in Lakeland, Florida. She is a homeschooling mom who lives to love well. Lover of all things creative, coffee, and community. She is the co-founder of The 12×12 project.www.eatdrinkandbejesus.blogspot.com www.the12x12project.com
Homemaker. Stay-at-home-mom. Homeschooling mom. Homebody. All of those words describe a part of who I am. If you notice the word “home” shows up in each description. I love our “home” (our family) and I’m so blessed to serve our family everyday. I’m the happiest when our home is full of laughter and learning and some sort of baked good. (Yep. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Some days, I need to sneak a chocolate chip cookie without the little people seeing me! Don’t judge me! It gets crazy here sometimes!)
My husband works 2 part-time jobs, runs his own business, and is a full-time student. He is not home nearly as much as I am so I tend to take ownership of things around here. (Well. . . except for taking out the trash and putting away the laundry. He can own those things. Really.) I, often without realizing, make parenting choices without him, just because he is not here, not because I don’t need and value his input. That is why I am so glad that we have learned/are learning that parenting is a TEAM SPORT.
If we are not playing for the same team this house is not going to withstand the thrashing of our 3 kids. Don’t get me wrong…we have some incredible children. I know they don’t intentionally try to destroy things, but I have observed that when my husband and I are not “playing on the same team”, or if we are divided on an issue, the kids totally pick up on it. They need the security of knowing mom and dad are together on things. They need to see us as a united front.
Sure, there will be disagreements. That’s part of life. But here are some tips and tricks from our “parenting playbook” that help us get through life together and keep us playing for the same team:
- Parent by the Book. More than anything, we want our children to have a deep love for God and His Word. With every correction and every discipline we affirm our children through scripture. We speak to their heart issue, not just the physical display of disobedience. We read the bible all throughout the day. We sing bible songs. We play bible games. Yes, we want our children accountable to us, but more than anything we want them accountable to the Lord. A great resource that our family loves is the Child Training Bible. You can find more information about that here: http://www.childtrainingbible.com
- Don’t argue about parenting or discipline issues in front of the children. Okay, let’s be real. That should say “we TRY not to argue…” We want our children to know that Daddy and Mommy are on the same team. We don’t want them to feel insecure about our relationship. I especially do not enjoy when one child asks me something, does not like my answer, and then goes and asks Daddy the same question. The more consistent we are, the more our kids will respect our answers and understand that “our yes means yes and our no means no”.
- Support your spouse. This one is simple. Support your man. I know it’s hard to give them space to parent after we’ve been the ones home all day but if you trust that your man is a God-fearing, God-loving, awesome daddy (like my guy is) then trust him! Never undermine his authority in front of the children. Remember: United front. Team players.
- Help each other with tasks that are outside of your “expected” roles. I know. A lot of people really don’t like this thought but it works so well for us. We truly go at life like team players and we’re better because of it. Remember, when I mentioned, “my husband owning the laundry”? Yeah. He does the laundry. AND he does it without me asking. (I’m blessed. I know!) Nate helps me with one million other things that most guys won’t engage in. I find enjoyment in helping him with his business, organization, writing, and other odds and ends, too. We do life together. Isn’t that what marriage is about? I want our children to remember how we served one another and how we helped one another do what we needed to do. I pray that they will also have loving, helpful, servant-hearted spouses that will do the same!
We’re only 6 years (and 3 kids) into this “sport” of parenting. I’m sure many reading this have much more knowledge and wisdom to offer. I pray my humble thoughts and words would help you on your parenting journey!
Here’s to parenting together!Ida Mundell www.the12x12project.com www.eatdrinkandbejesus.blogspot.com www.childtrainingbible.com www.natemundellphotography.com