Balancing Life in Today’s Society
I share with you part of a speech I had the honor of delivering this past April at an Administrator’s Luncheon with our local Chamber of Commerce. Also, this introduces the information that will be discussed in Brake 5’s Online Fall Sessions beginning Tuesday, September 15th. I hope you are encouraged and it brings practical and spiritual wisdom to your life.
“The idle man will go nowhere. The perpetually busy man does not get much further.” – author unknown
What I am about to share with you is GOLD!
Gold nuggets of encouragement that will help you detox, rid yourself of stress, and bring balance to your life. We could all use a little more time, rest, and fun in our lives. Some of you might already be demonstrating a few of these and if so, PERFECT! ‘To much is given much is required.’, as the good book says. We are all purposed in life to share what we know. Sharing ‘growth knowledge’ keeps us living an abundant life.
One of my past employers told me that I would not be successful in managing my business. Well, let’s just say, do not tell me I cannot do anything because if you do I will succeed at proving to you that I can. I have learned something about failure and this something that I teach my kids. Failure is NOT a person. Failure does not exist. So, do not allow it in your vocabulary. Failing at something is learning another way that does not work. Today, after 20 years, I’ve owned at least three businesses two of which have been running for 19 years.
Why would I say. ‘Failure does not exist’? If you allow something to take residence within your mind and spirit you have given it seed to grow. If you live your life out of the fear of failing then you will not ever do anything, go anywhere, or discover your purpose in life. We live moment by moment – Success is a continual movement and the end accomplishment is the evidence transpired from that movement. So, you make a mistake . . . Get back up and keep moving!
While traveling this road called life and striving for success we put on many hats. I daily wear the hats of wife, mom, business owner, pastor, mentor, coach, writer, full-time student, taxi driver, nurse, cook, pet groomer, etc. You get the picture. I am a very busy woman! Life never stops for the hurting and those who have the ability to bring healing sometimes the door is always open . . . or should that door at some point be closed??? Learning to balance life and the hats we wear takes discipline, wisdom, and time. Most importantly, it takes implementing 4 KEYS.
4 Keys to Living a Balanced Life
Right now, I want you to quickly think about the top 3 things that take up your time each day. Quickly – whatever comes to your mind first. Be honest with yourself and do not change the list after you view it. Now, write them down and look them over. These three things you have written are what you give entitlement ownership of your life. You are daily connected to them – you have connected your mind, body, and spirit without realizing it. Some of these may be positive and some may be negative but truth be told they own you. Remember these three while reading forward.
When your mind, body, and spirit are out of balance something someone will begin to receive the leftovers. Usually, it is those who are closest to you. When one of these elements in our lives is unbalanced, the other two have to pick up the slack. This creates stress and friction causing you to become overwhelmed, tired, and lose focus. We have all been there. We say, “I just need a vacation, some ‘me’ time.” However, where is the time?
Think of the top 4 priorities in your life. This is a different list than the one above. However, you will soon notice if they align. Personally, my four are my faith, my family, myself, and my work – in that order. I do not go outside of the grid. I use too, and I was burnt out, miserable, and not the most pleasant person to be around. Believe me no one wanted to be around me. I did not even want to be around me! Now, take those top 4 and compare them to your top 3 time takers. Do they match? If so, great than you are one of those individuals that has some ‘growth knowledge’ to share. If not, I encourage you to reevaluate what really matters most to you. How do you make boundaries work in your life? Create boundaries by learning these small steps.
Use Time Management
Be realistic with your time. Do not over extend yourself. Do not take on more than you can in a day or a week. Calendar out your week. Make sure to put in a ‘ME’ day at least once a week.
Work More Wisely
TEAM is essential in any business for excellence and success. Share the workload and do not micromanage. Learn to delegate and work wisely.
Learn the word ‘NO’!
Say ‘NO’ to the unimportant things. This will help you walk in excellence in the things that are most important. Nothing should control your life. If something does not fit in – line up with your top 4 priorities – than it is a NO. Otherwise, just wait for the negative ripple effect. You have ownership over your life. Things, events, or people should not. Take back your ownership, today!
Place a mental WHITE FENCE around your life and your priorities. Nothing is allowed in unless you give permission. Be responsible for what is yours and do not take on someone else’s responsibilities, battles, or toxic situations. Your heart might want to help but stop, think, and imagine what it would be like and how it will affect your top 4. Then decide if it is really worth the time you do not have.
Learning to say ‘NO’ allows time for your family and you to grow together. Work should have a budgeted time. Work stays at work so do not bring it home. If you work at home, like I do, designate a place just for your work. Make it off-limits after a certain time of the day and do not merge the two. So, you can enter another room and not feel the pressure of the ‘TO DO’ list.
Having relationships, the right positive ones, creates balance. A group of friends, one to three are great accountability partners. They will keep you growing allowing you to experience and create an abundant life. A person should not be an island unto him or herself. We were created for relationships. Those toxic relationships that bring negativity, or those that seem to consume all your time, or those that do not allow you to be your true self will keep you from growing. It’s time to DETOX!
Accountability is key to anyone having truth spoken into their life. We all need someone in our life who is not afraid to speak truth, who we allow in our ‘chili pot’! For the last two years, I have met weekly with a group of 4 women and we allow each other to do just that! We’ve grown to love each other as sisters and we allow each to speak truth, we pray with one another, and we encourage one another. We are constantly growing!
Growth – Never stop learning
Always keep your mind awake. Do not ever believe the lie that you know everything that there is to know about ANYTHING. You will only deceive yourself and rob yourself from an abundant life. There are so many facets unknown to us about our Creator. So, why limit yourself to what man has spoken. Study the word, find it for yourself! Take on a new college course, learn a new skill set, pick up a new hobby, just never stop learning! Our brain is so complex and the more we learn the stronger it becomes. Our spirit is the same the more we learn of God and His ways the stronger it becomes. So, why limit yourself! Always remain teachable and continually seek out new things to discover. Growth is not overrated at any age. If there is something you do not know how to do, do not allow fear to keep you stagnant.
If something does not challenge you, it won’t change you.
Continue to grow.
Changes are inevitable but growth from change is a choice.
Know Your Value
Your value is not in what you do! I constantly tell my husband Keith, who is a world renown artist, a gifted man, a brilliant and loving soul – that his value is not in what he creates through the paint brush. His value is in who is as a person. Placing your value in what you do will keep you on the hamster wheel, running circles, and not going anywhere. One day you may not be able to create anything with your physical body (hands, mind, etc.). What will you be left with if all is gone? Your value is produced out of how you have decided to grow. It is produced by building your character, integrity, and respecting others. When a person knows their value, they are able to look past themselves and begin to pull out the gold in others.
The one thing that keeps you from discovering your value, keeps you from creating boundaries, keeps you from experiencing fulfilled relationships is FEAR. Let fear come in and take residence in your soul and it will begin to take over. Do not allow fear to win. Instead, run towards those things that scare you and believe me you will conquer your fears and experience a well-balanced life.
All Brake 5 Blogs and written works by Jennifer Goodson are Copyright © 2008-2015. All Rights Reserved.
Jennifer ministers to women from all walks of life worldwide. Weekly she provides pastoral counseling to women seeking coaching & connecting them with other professionals within their local areas. Call for an appointment today. If you would like to financially support what Brake 5 is doing please contact our offices via email or phone.